5.29.2010
Shawna's In Labor
5.18.2010
PBS and Vaccinations
Enjoy Birth made an observation today regarding Vaccine Wars. And I agree.
My number one goal is to make sure that parents are making extremely informed choices regarding their families health care. I don't have an issue when your choices are not mine, the professional in me has no judgment, as long as it is done with true INFORMED choice.
PBS Frontline recently did a bit called Vaccine Wars. I knew when I saw it scheduled to air that it was going to be a promotion for vaccinations rather than a balanced debate allowing families the chance to glean both sides and make educated choices. I knew I was going to be upset. If you so choose, you can see the whole thing on the site referenced above.
Doubly frustrating was the fact that Dr. Jay Gordon's extensive interview was completely left out of the final product. He responds here.
Although I understand the need to cut some people from the show because of time constraints, some points he makes about that issue are:
"The Frontline show was disgraceful. You didn't even have the courtesy to put my interview or any part of the two hours we spent taping on your web site.You created a pseudo-documentary with a preconceived set of conclusions: "Irresponsible moms against science" was an easy takeaway from the show."...
"No one pursued Dr. Offit's response about becoming rich from the vaccine he invented. He was allowed to slide right by that question without any follow up...."
"Jenny McCarthy resumed being a "former Playboy" person and was not acknowledged as a successful author, actress and mother exploring every possible avenue to treating her own son and the children of tens of thousands of other families."I am, otoh, very very happy to see Dr. Sears' interview there. He shares intimate information as to his opinion of many of the books on the market that question vaccinations. I love that he talks about his alternative vaccination schedule, I don't love that the questions are very slanted to portray the CDC and vaccination/schedule that is already in place as superior and the best choice. I do love that Dr. Sears says that, although he trusts the CDC, he believes that the system could be better.
And finally, I LOVE that he advocates for physicians to man-up (so to speak) and simply admit when vaccines do give children bad reactions - which can save those children from further harm.
So, all in all, I don't like war, but I like good healthy debate, a parent's complete right to full and informed options and risks, and I like doctors being held accountable to honesty when medicine goes awry.
5.17.2010
Say what?!?
It doesn't matter that it is wrong, it doesn't matter that it is not the girl's choice because she has been indoctrinated to believe it is necessary, that she is old enough to say no. It doesn't matter that it is a permanent procedure that alters her body with very real and possible risks to her childbearing and overall health long-term, not to mention the emotional scarring: distrust, sexual disfunction, and so much more...What would you think if the American Academy of Pediatrics condoned this?
Well, it's real.
Immigrant families that wish to preserve their local traditions sometimes approach Western doctors to perform FGC on their daughters. In its new report, the AAP advises doctors to inform families that the procedure is medically unnecessary and even dangerous. Should the families be resolute, the AAP raises the idea of legalizing a less-severe ritual cutting - akin, the policy statement says, to an "ear piercing" - to dissuade parents from sending their daughters to be circumcised in their home country, where medical conditions are likely to be far worse.Even the title of the article irks and sickens me... 'Nicks' that are likened to an 'ear piercing'??? C'mon, call it what it is: genital mutilation... or, to be a little more PC, we can call it female circumcision.. because, as we can tell from their reasons for FMG, the cultures and religions where this is routine practice will not be quelled by a 'ritualistic nick'..
Thankfully, the entire piece is not a rally to show support of this proposition.
"Encouraging pediatricians to perform FGM under the notion of 'cultural sensitivity' shows a shocking lack of understanding of a girl's fundamental right to bodily integrity and equality," says Taina Bien-Aime, executive director of the human rights organization Equality Now. "If foot-binding were still being carried out, would the AAP encourage pediatricians to execute a milder version of this practice?"It angers and sickens me. Sure, it's barbaric, but it's also unsafe... so let's just make it more safe and less barbaric, that makes it ok!!?!
I am left. just. speechless. Thoughts?
For further reading:
FGM Network
IRIN
Mirrors
I look in the mirror and
I am beautiful
Rounded face
and dimpled cheeks
soft and full
a princess
whirl and twirl
for daddy
braids and curls
from mommy
Daddy calls me princess
Mommy calls me gorgeous
I am 7
I look in the mirror and
I see what I want, not what I am
I hate my hair
I want to look like Susie
I fall and rip my jeans
and momma gets mad
Tomboy, says daddy
with no adoration
gangly and clumsy
Daddy is too busy for spinning
and momma misses dinner
I am 14
I look in the mirror and
I am ugly
Braces, pimples
buttons, not breasts
I have curves
in all the wrong places
Commercials say
tuck this, paint that
Mediocre
Dad doesn't hug me
Mom gives me diet books
I am 17
My boyfriend is my mirror
He says I am beautiful
when I let him touch me
My friend's are my mirror
They say I am beautiful
When I deprive myself
Society is my mirror
and it says I am beautiful
If I pluck, puke, and show skin
The mirror on my wall
betrays me
I am lost
I am 24
I have ditched the mirror
I am awkwardly searching
My father is distant
My mother is critical
my belly swells with new life
But I am ok
My friends have issues
But they are not mine
I grow, I change
I learn to love myself
I am 30
I am my own mirror
pleasantly curvy
in all places
consciously living
comfortable in my own skin
tying my daughter's hair
in pigtails
and watching my partner
twirl and whirl with her
We eat, we breathe, we live
and I am beautiful
I am 40
My daughter is my mirror
She is confident
and she is healthy
We learn together
we laugh together
she knows she is lovely
dad holds her tight
and I learn to let her go
she is beautiful
I am 50
The world is my mirror
my friends are few
but precious
my parents are flawed
but forgiven
my partner is lined
but lovely
my happiness is in
what I do, who I am
And I am balanced
I am 65
My body is my mirror
I have lines on my eyes
from smiling
I have sun spots
from adventuring
I have wiry hair
from sleeping in
I have sagging breasts
and silver lines
from bringing forth life
I am beautiful to my partner
I am life, personified
5.16.2010
Mother of Many
Check it out and vote. Then give me your thoughts...
Texas
I will be in Galveston, Texas toward the end of this week. I would love to get together with a few of my readers who live out that way (if there are any). If you will be available this coming Saturday, feel free to get a hold of me via my email in my profile. :)
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #17
I am extremely excited to announce to you that the final giveaway is a full Hypnobabies Hypno-Doula Bundle!
This set is for the doula who wants more resources in her Birth Tools bag for clients. This is an excellent training for any birth doula - as hypno-mamas require a different type of relaxation and doula-ing than other women.Our Hypno-Doula Bundle includes: (see full descriptions at the bottom of this page)Unfortunately, Kerry and I have not yet had the chance to finish up with our interview. But, I wanted to post this giveaway in order to keep in our timeline - so please be keeping an eye open for her interview at a later date!
1) Our Hypnobabies Hypno-Doula Workbook
2) Our Hypno-Doula Study Guide for Certification with Hypnobabies
3) FIVE Hypnobabies CDs
4) An informational booklet on Hypnosis for Childbirth, for your clients
Each birthing woman is unique, and as you nurture your Hypno-clients through an easier and more comfortable childbirth, everyone will appreciate the time you took to learn these new skills.
Included with your Hypno-Doula Workbook are 8 pages of Hypno-birth Prompts to use with your laboring Hypno-moms (verbal cues to keep them in hypnosis as they labor) a Hypnobabies CD to help your regular hypno-birth clients enter hypnosis instantly, (Entering Hypnosis with a Special Word Cue) and the same script on paper for direct use with clients during prenatal meetings for a more personal approach.
**PLEASE NOTE: Our Hypno-Doula Workbook will *not* teach you to become a Hypnobabies Childbirth Instructor, or a teacher of any other birth hypnosis method. It does not allow you to train expectant mothers to use childbirth hypnosis. It trains you to *help* birthing mothers who are using childbirth hypnosis to have a much easier childbirth experience, using their own Hypno-tools and techniques to the maximum benefit. You become a Hypno…Doula!
Hypno-Doula Study Guide: AFTER studying our Hypnobabies Hypno-Doula Workbook, you will complete the Study Guide by answering the questions, writing the essays and filling in the blanks in your own words.
You will then send the Study Guide back to Hypnobabies for grading. You must receive a grade of 95 percent or higher to become certified. All accepted Study Guides will be kept by Hypnobabies and you will be contacted by e-mail to provide us with a professional Hypno-Doula Listing. After certification, your listing will be placed on our Find a Hypno-Doula page at www.Hypnobabies.com and you will receive a Certified Hypno-Doula certificate.
* PLEASE NOTE: There is no additional charge for certification as a Hypno-Doula. The Study Guide price includes our Hypnobabies Certification and website listing fee.*
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit Hypnobabies, browse their site, then come back and let me know what new thing you learned on their site.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, "like" Hypnobabies (or let me know if you already do) on Facebook, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, head over to their Youtube channel, then come back and let me know which video(s) you enjoyed and why.
- For an additional entry, subscribe to them on Twitter, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
This wraps up our giveaway!!!
5.15.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #16
This subscription would be perfect for any doula, postpartum or birth.
Mothering celebrates the experience of parenthood as worthy of one's best efforts and fosters awareness of the immense importance and value of parenthood and family life in the development of the full human potential. As a readers' magazine, we recognize parents as the experts and wish to provide truly helpful information upon which parents can base informed choices.Unfortunately, Peggy and I have not yet had the chance to finish up with our interview. But, I wanted to post this giveaway in order to keep in our timeline - so please be keeping an eye open for her interview at a later date!
Mothering is like no other publication. We are an original. Born in 1976 out of the need for the natural family community to learn about raising healthy children, Mothering was the birthplace of the natural family lifestyle.
Read in more than 65 countries, Mothering is the only independently owned, family living magazine in the world. We address contemporary health, personal, environmental, medical, and lifestyle issues in an upbeat, intelligent, compassionate, and courageous way.
Each issue contains philosophical inspiration and practical advice about family living. Topics are as diverse as circumcision, vaccinations, organic foods, childhood illnesses, home birth, ear infections, parenting teens, web site information, midwifery, and homeopathy.
Mothering is a family. We have an independent editorial spirit unmatched in the industry and a readership that is unmatched in responsiveness. Readers who read Mothering share many of the same values. Nowhere else will you find such proactive, passionate, and highly educated readers. In the pages of Mothering you will find an environment of credibility, trust, and authority.
If you have never read Mothering, you are missing out! Thank you, again, Peggy, and all of Mothering Magazine, for your donation!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit Mothering.com, browse their articles, then come back and let me know which was the most helpful to you and why (and provide a link for the other readers too, please).
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, "like" Mothering (or let me know if you already do) on Facebook, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, subscribe to their newsletter, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
5.14.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #15
I am ecstatic to say that she has offered a copy for our International Doula Month giveaway!
This delightful book is a photographic guide to help women feel confident and prepared for nursing."Breastfeeding with Comfort and Joy is magnificent. It's like having a wise and loving grandmother show you exactly how to nurse your baby." - Christiane Northrup, MD, author of Women's Bodies, Women's WisdomAlthough we have yet to interview, I wanted to post this giveaway in order to keep in our timeline - so please be keeping an eye open for her interview!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit her website, then come back and let me know which review was the most helpful to you and why. You can also visit her online reviews on her blog (on right panel) for this entry. :)
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, "like" her professional FB account, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, subscribe to her blog, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
Just a Reminder
I have listed 14 giveaways so far this month. If you missed one of them or are a late-comer to the giveaways, be sure to check them all out. You can enter to win as many of the giveaways as you wish! We have listed for giveaway, so far:
- A gorgeous Unakite Pregnancy Goddess Necklace
- 2 copies (which means two winners) of the book "We're Having a Homebirth"
- The latest edition of The Birth Project and 3 awesome birth pins
- 2 beautiful necklaces (which means two winners) - a blooming belly and a vulva
- A sweet mini bellycast
- A hip and unique vulva lip balm
- A midwifery baby scale hammock/sling
- A gift certificate for $100 off a birth pool rental
- A breathtaking painting called "I Loved You Before I Met You II"
- Some educational and cute knitted breasts
- The educational and instructive DVD "Comfort Measures for Childbirth The Rebozo Way"
- A wonderful Postpartum Gift Basket chock full of goodies
- A personalizable knitted uterus
- And an adorable Lil Nipper 'boobie' hat
5.13.2010
Cafe Manager Berates Breastfeeding Mom
(More information here)
Very interesting, I will be watching What Would You Do tomorrow night.. feel free to come back to discuss after the airing.
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #14
It's JUST a BOOB people! And now it's 100% cotton!
A wise woman (see http://thecoffeebra.etsy.com) once said to me "you need more boob in your shop." We had a good laugh, then realized that it may not be such a bad idea after all.
You see, we're both moms of young children, recently out of the newborn trenches and veterans of nursing in public. For the most part, people are understanding because, after all, a baby needs to eat and when they're hungry they're HUNGRY! But then you get the not so understanding people. "That's disgusting." "Cover up!' "Couldn't you do that somewhere else?" At some point, every nursing mother wants to scream "it's JUST a BOOB people!"
And now you can say it with a smile. And a giggle.
Introducing...The Original La Leche Lid Little Nipper. A 100% silky soft cotton baby cap. Pop it on baby at feeding time to keep that noggin warm and let it all hang out. After lunch, it's simply a cozy fashion statement. Warm enough for colder climates, light enough to take off the chill in air conditioned spaces without overheating baby. A neutral beige "breast" is topped off with a rosy pink "nipple" ~ other sizes and skin tones available upon request! Knitted in the round for a completely seamless finish. Sized to fit the tiniest newborn.
Tell us a little about yourself:
I'm a "stay at home" mom of 3, ages 2, 6, and 9. I'm rarely "at home," but rather spend most of my time in the car and at kids activities. I knit to pass the time. I knit a lot!How did you get into this line of work (i.e. why did you start knitting boobs for baby heads?):
I learned to knit from my Grandma when I was little...6 or 7. Then put it down and didn't pick it up again until I was pregnant with my first child at 24. When my second was born, I became obsessed with making hats. They're just fun!What makes your heart skip a beat, hold your breath, or sigh with happiness:
The Little Nipper started out as a late night conversation between a friend and I and she jokingly told me that to boost sales I needed "more boob" in my shop. But the more we thought about it it seemed like there might be a good idea in there somewhere. At the time we were both moms of 3 year old's but remembered not that long ago being nursing moms. For all of the people out there that are accepting of breastfeeding in public, there are always a couple that think it's inappropriate. I thought a little newborn breast hat would send a fairly straight forward, if a bit tongue in cheek, message that "hey, it's JUST a BOOB, people!"
2 things...Baby belly laughs! They're the best, 100% pure joy. I will tickle my toddler without mercy to hear those laughs. And the ocean. The smell, the sound, it's my happy place that I rarely get to, living in Colorado.If you had to choose one item that you sell, what is your favorite and why:
That's like asking me which of my kids is my favorite! They all have a special place. I really enjoy making my flowered hats (such as Rosy Posy and Cocoa Bouquet) because of the endless color possibilities they hold. They're fun to knit too. My Who Hats and The Little Nipper are like my comfort food. I could knit those with my eyes closed. My favorite knits are custom orders though. I like being able to work with someone to put together something new and unique and truly special.When you think of a doula, what do you think:
calm, comfort, supportConsequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
This is a tough one for me, and I know it can be such a hot button topic. I have a slightly different perspective on it than some. I didn't have typical pregnancies. We had a very difficult time conceiving and had several losses before having a successful pregnancy. So for ME, I was less concerned with how the baby got out than I was just having a healthy baby. We needed medical intervention to get pregnant, so I was prepared for medical intervention to give birth if necessary. I felt that the key was finding a caregiver that I trusted 100% to do what was best for me, but wouldn't push me beyond my own comfort zone unless it was absolutely necessary. By the time we had our first child, I already had a very comfortable, trusting relationship with my caregiver. But I know that others don't necessarily share my views or ideals, and I'm glad we live in a country where there are options for everyone.Anything Else that you would like us to know about you:
On the rare occasion I'm not running kids around or knitting, I like to bake, have shopping and cheesecake dates with the moms of coloradomoms and I'm a huge...HUGE...lacrosse fan (Go Mammoth!) ;)You can find Kate on on Etsy, FaceBook, Twitter, and at a local Mom Group Blog. Thanks, Kate, for your fun donation!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit her etsy store, then come back and let me know which item is your favorite in their store.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, "like" her professional FB account, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, follow KnitSchmidt on Twitter, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, check out the mom blog, then let me know which post most resonates/you enjoyed in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
5.12.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #13
The knitted uterus is an excellent learning tool for Childbirth Educators and doulas! Features a 'C Section Incision' which can be omitted upon request, also a drawstring opening on top to easily insert a 'baby.' Measures 8" from top to bottom, stretches to accommodate a 'head' of 4.5"in diameter. Knitted from 100% acrylic yarn. Entirely washable. Can be made in custom colors. Handmade to order, time from order to delivery will be two weeks. Please take a moment to get to know Julia, who, like so many of the wonderful mompreneurs featured this month, juggles a great many talents and glows despite it all!
I am 40 yr. old mother of two (12 &15) and currently expecting my third (due in August).Thank you, so much, Julia!
I became a PPD 5 years ago and recently became a Certified Lactation Educator. I got involved in natural childbirth unwittingly when I had my first child at the “Long Island Birthing Ctr.” I had been given a copy of “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” and was dutifully reading it when there appeared a question about how a mother had broken her tailbone during delivery – the books’ response was ‘well, it can happen, that’s why they call it labor!’ which I thought was ridiculous. If that mother had delivered her baby standing, squatting, or hanging from a trapeze, her tailbone would have been just fine. I felt for a hospital to send a new mother home with a new baby, an episiotomy, AND a broken tailbone was unnecessary and abusive.
I actually looked in my phone book…it was 1995 – that was all there was to look in, and found ‘the Long Island Birthing Center” in Melville, NY. After one tour I was sold. I labored in a gigantic pool of warm water, I tried about 10 different positions when I started pushing, finding one that worked for me, not my midwife, and had a long exhausting and wonderful birth.
3 years later I was pregnant again and the birth center had closed down, displacing many midwives to a local hospital – after touring it I realized hospitals had no interest in the comfort of its customers and seemingly, had not put one iota of common sense towards setting up a room in which to have a baby in. So I opted to have my son at home. I labored for 12 hours, and again, it was wonderful birth.
My family, while initially terrified at my choices, learned more about natural childbirth and eventually my younger sister decided to become a home birth midwife. Her becoming a midwife revealed many new jobs that I had not previously heard of, including labor doula and postpartum doula.
In 2005 I met up with women who would become the founding members of ‘the Long Island Doula Association’ , of which I am a council member. We are a group of doulas, CBE’s, midwives, acupuncturists, chiropractors, and more. A friend I met through LIDA once asked me if I could knit a breast…I hadn’t thought of it before, but it seemed easy enough. She was looking for a prop of sorts so she could explain breastfeeding holds to new Mom’s more easily. By the next meeting I had made two for her …one ‘black ‘ and one ‘white.’
I started knitting in 2000 – I was about 30 and needed something to keep my hands busy while I quit smoking. I quickly loved it and brought my knitting with me everywhere. When I inadvertently stumbled upon a pattern for a knitted uterus, I put it together immediately! I even included pipe cleaners to hold up the ‘fallopian tubes’ - very slowly it dawned on me how to adjust the pattern to make it into something more ‘user friendly’ for my friends who worked as labor doulas or childbirth educators.
I decided to start selling on Etsy about a year ago and initially the site was going in 20 different directions. I was selling doula products, baby products, all unrelated and the site felt disjointed. I saw that my best markets for these products were other doulas – I even got a special request for a placenta which immediately became a standard on my site. I have aspirations to start another site with some baby items listed on it along with possibly some nursing wear – since that has suddenly become very relevant to me again!
I am hoping to have a website finished by the end of this month, but for now, the best places to find me are at etsy and lidoulas (check out the “Fundraising Boutique”)
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit her etsy store, then come back and let me know which item is your favorite.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, post on your FB or on your own blog about the benefits of pregnancy and birth education, to commemorate Int'l Doula Month, with link back to my blog, then comment here with the link to your posting.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
5.11.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #12
Leslie is owner of Wildroots Etsy shop. She is also donating her Wildroots Postpartum Gift Basket to our giveaway festival today! This prize would be great for a postpartum doula, or even a birth doula who offers postpartum care as well.
Wildroots Post Partum Gift Basket is a wonderful gift for yourself or someone you know for after birth care. The post partum time is such a crucial time to nourish the body. These creations will help to make a smooth transition so that you can spend your time just loving that new little baby.Her basket includes:
RICH MILK TEA: Used by many nursing women as a way to support and increase milk supply. This tasty tea is a traditional nourishing tonic that not only supports healthy milk production; it also provides benefits to the digestive system of both the Mother and Baby. Each tin contains 1.8 ounces of tea which makes approx. 20 cups of tea. Brewing instructions on the label.
POST PARTUM TEA: Promotes healthy uterine recovery with added benefits of lifting the spirit. She has crafted this tea with herbs known for centuries to aid in in the healing process for women after birthing.
This tea is one of her personal favorite. It is wonderful also for all times in a woman's reproductive life, but particularly suited for after child bearing. Most of these ingredients are grown on her farm.
SITZ BATH SPRAY: She is incredibly pleased with this creation! Her Sitz Bath Spray contains traditional sitz bath herbs that we have distilled. It is all ready for use, where as sitz bath herbs you need to brew up. This can be very hard to get to with a new little one and a mama who is needed to recover. This wonderful blend of herbs is so incredibly helpful to women after the birth of their babies. She have seen it work so effectively with so many of my doula clients, friends and herself!
Wildroot's Sitz Bath works to support the healing of tissues after birth. Her blend helps repair the perineum and vaginal tissues, as well as providing anti microbial properties to this vulnerable postpartum area. Each of her Sitz Bath Sprays contain 4 oz of distilled herbs and comes in a nice brushed metal spray top container.
SORE NIPPLE SALVE: An excellent companion for new nursing mama's. This rich and deeply nourishing salve is infused with botanicals known to bring ease and repair to the skin.
This gentle salve is made with care to help make that first time of nursing your new baby so much easier.
Leslie is a childbirth educator, doula, and midwife apprentice - so I felt kindred spirits with her immediately. I invite you to get to know the woman behind today's giveaway by reading below!
I live in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where the Cascade mountains meet the Puget Sound with my husband Orion and my new little baby Kosta. We own a small herb farm where we grow many herbs for our products and spend much time in the wilds wild harvesting. We love our lives here.
I have been a practicing labor support doula, post partum doula and childbirth educator since 2004 as well as a midwifery apprentice.
I have been interested in herbs from an early age. My sister and I would make herb teas and treats from our moms gardens when we were kids. I more officially began herbal studies during College where I graduated with a degree in Holistic Health: Herbs and Somatics. I apprenticed with various local herbalists and then worked with Linda Quintana who owns Wonderland Teas in Bellingham, WA. What a great teacher she is!
Spending time with my family makes me so happy. My little boy often wakes me up laughing. We love spending time in the woods and outside, discovering new mysteries of this wonderful Earth we live upon.When you think of a doula, what do you think:
I am really loving our distillations. We are distilling floral waters and essential oils from our wild harvests and from our herbs out at the farm. They are so versatile. Some of our customers have been using them in their cooking and as an ingredient in mixed drinks. Others use them in lotion making and aromatherapy. I love our sitz bath spray. It is so easy to use and it is extremely fresh. We distilled herbs used in our sitz bath. It is so healing and soothing after birth.
A woman familiar with the birthing process that empowers the birthing mother and assists in the preparation and process of the childbearing time.Consequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
I think we have a long way to go....I feel a deep sadness for the way so many women are treated during the births of their children. So much of the mainstream birth practices take the power and the knowing away from the mother. Birth can be so trans-formative. It is our rights of passage... My hopes are for all women to feel empowered through their birthing process, whether it is a "natural birth" or not. All women should feel that they are the ones making the decisions and not being coerced into what the practitioner wants to do.Anything Else that you would like us to know about you:
We offer many workshops in herbal medicine and plant identification and an internship program. Contact us if you are interested or if you have any questions at all about herbs! We always love to chat.She has a professional website, an Etsy shop, and she is on FaceBook. Leslie, thank you so much for your donation and for the chance to get to know you!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit her etsy store, then come back and let me know which item is your favorite.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, sign up for their newsletter, then let me know that you did in a comment here (I will check on these with Leslie ;-)).
- For an additional entry, post on your FB or on your own blog about the benefits of a postpartum doula, to commemorate Int'l Doula Month, with link back to my blog, then comment here with the link to your posting.
- For an additional entry, "Like" her on FB, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
Doula Story - The beginning
So, she wanted to share her journey to finding her doula thus far. This mama is a great encouragement to mothers-to-be in her tenacity to find the right doula for her situation and personality!
I'm a single mama to be and have no family support at all and was feeling very much alone and scared to have my first baby by myself. I'm also low income and knew I'd never be able to afford a doula. I really wanted one though so I did a Google search and found a group that has volunteer doulas. I met with one and she seemed fine enough,but there was no "magic connection" that I've read about some mamas having with their doulas. It was ok though,maybe we just needed to meet again and have our first "official meeting" to get that.Thank you, Michelle, for your story thus far. I hope that you will come back and share more about your prenatals and your birth story later on!
After a few e-mails when I asked for some emotion support and didn't feel she was giving me what I needed I asked the woman who runs the organization a few questions and was told I was asking for to much from my doula and that I needed to be more "self reliant and that was the lesson about being pregnant and giving birth". I knew it wasn't going to work with this doula or the organization,but I didn't give up.
I did another Google search and sent out a few e-mails to some random doulas in my area and 3 called me back the next day! Magic instant connection with the first one I spoke with! I explained what I thought a doula should be and what I was hoping for and she agreed with me and we seemed to be on the same page. It was great! Our first in person meeting will be in one week and I can't wait! Oh and she's also willing to do a barter/exchange with me! I have a VERY good feeling about my new doula and feel she can guide me through the birth and it can be what I need it to be.
5.10.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #11
Connie Livingston is the owner of BirthSource, an RN, a CD, an ICCE, an aromatherapist, and the president of Perinatal Education Associates, to name just a few.She has also chosen to donate the awesome DVD, "Comfort Measures for Childbirth The Rebozo Way".
A Rebozo is a Mexican shawl that has been used by Traditional Mexican Midwives for centuries. They have been used it for different purposes:- Position the baby for a normal vaginal birth.
- Relax and give pregnant women reassurance.
- Decrease women's discomfort during pregnancy due to awkward position of the fetus.
- Accommodate baby during labor for a normal birth.
As Connie is such a diversely talented business woman and advocate, it was a delight to read more about her passions and personality.
I have been a nurse for 34 years and a doula/childbirth educator for almost as long! My specialty is birth research. Birth is my PASSION and I immerse myself in it each and every day. I also love mentoring new childbirth educators and doulas and nurses! The most important piece of all this is my incredibly supportive husband and family. Without their support, I couldn’t have accomplished all that I have!How did Birthsource come about:
Birthsource started in 1999, during a time when there was virtually NO information about birth and parenting on the internet. All articles have always been evidence-based and writing by professionals. Today, Birthsource has won numerous awards and has the HON Code Seal – a very prestigious seal noting evidence-based information. Our website is scanned and evaluated regularly to maintain this honor. In 2003, we added the online store to help parents and professionals find top quality products. Now we also provide continuing education workshops – in 2010, we’ll be adding online education plus podcasts and videocasts!What makes your heart skip a beat, hold your breath, or sigh with happiness:
Babies skin-to-skin - the dynamics there is fantastic and breath-taking!If you had to choose one item or offering on your site, what is your favorite and why:
My favorite item is the Professional Office Series: Doula Office, CBE Office and Postpartum Doula Office. This set of software give the professional a jump start on their career. We have sold thousands of these CDs and have gotten rave reviews. But our newest help, Creating And Marketing Your Birth Related Business, is a book that will help birth professionals set themselves up legally and market wisely! So it is really hard to choose!When you think of a doula, what do you think:
I think of a guide through a jungle. The doula helps expectant parents navigate the US maternity health care system in every way to achieve the optimal birth from the circumstances presented.Consequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
We in the U.S. are at a dynamic turning point. With the help of Childbirth Connection, we’ve been able to define and identify evidence-based maternity care. Statistics from the CDC and other sources prove that our use of interventions has not improved maternal mortality/morbidity or infant mortality/morbidity. We MUST add to the training that nurses and residents receive – we must give them the tools to also facilitate physiologic birth along with those tools of crisis intervention. Only then can ALL health care professionals work together in unison to care of expectant parents. Working from the inside out – enabling hospitals and staff to recognize and care for the individual needs of individuals rather than give mass care for the masses. Our workshop, Evidence-based Maternity Care: Turning A-Ha Moments into Dynamic Practice is proving to be a part of this solution!Anything Else that you would like us to know about you or your site:
As a result of parent requests, in 2008 we began Birth Facts. This website has direct links to evidence-based research. Not only can parents benefit from this site, but hospitals have been telling me how beneficial it is to have this available when writing or updating policies, procedures and practice guidelines.
You can find us at BirthSource, Birth Facts, our Blog, on Facebook here or here, and on twitter.RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit BirthSource, then come back and let me know which item is your favorite in their store.
- For an additional entry, let me know which article under their professional's section you enjoyed the most and why.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, visit friend both her personal and professional FB account, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, follow on Twitter, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, follow Connie's blog, then let me know in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #10
Michelle is an awesome knitter, breastfeeding advocate, etsy store owner, and so much more!!! She owns the etsy store, Doula Boobies, and has donated a pair of knitted breasts! This prize would be great for a doula who works a lot with postpartum, breastfeeding, or doubles her career as a childbirth educator.
She will custom knit the winner's choice of either wheat/berry, cream/variegated or brown/brown breasts.I loved reading Michelle's answers to my interview questions and was amazed at what a multitasking, multi-talented mama she is!
My name is Michelle Nordblom Hottya, and I am a woman, a wife, mother, writer, editor, crafter, doula, childbirth educator, lactation educator and breastfeeding advocate. I've been involved in the world of natural childbirth and breastfeeding since my oldest child entered this world ten years ago. I give my brother credit for opening my eyes to the so-called "alternative" lifestyle of treating your family and our planet with gentleness and respect. My journey has taken me through three unmedicated childbirths -- two in the hospital and one at home -- as well as Bradley classes, numerous trainings to support birth and breastfeeding, quite a few lovely births and volunteering on the board of the Arizona Birth Network, for which I serve as Treasurer and sometime leader of Birth Circle meetings in our community. As a little side business, I crochet breast models and baby hats for my Etsy store.When you think of a doula, what do you think:
The path that brought me here has not been straight, but it has been a sure path with still a long distance to cover. After birthing my oldest, I heard of the "doula" and the idea intrigued me -- I felt so empowered by my experience that I wanted to help other women have it too. It wasn't until after the birth of my second child that I was able to start taking trainings and enter the certification process. When we moved to Arizona, I was able to quit working full-time and started attending births as a doula. Each person I meet enriches my experience and broadens my perspective, so I am always learning by living this vocation.
When my clients realize the potential of their own abilities, whether it is in the moment of choosing a homebirth, or looking upon the face of their new baby for the first time, or the day when breastfeeding just falls into place, I feel so rich with joy and value in my work that it makes all the other challenges just melt away into irrelevance. I celebrate with them and I feel their success too!
My new BooBee baby hats that are debuting in my store are so fun and controversial. I was inspired by Heather Cushman-Dowdee and her comic strip, Mama-Is-Crafty... some friends asked me to come up with a pattern, and now I can't keep up with the demand! I would love to see a BooBee hat on every nursing baby's head!
A woman who is a friend, a sister, a guide, a patient and gentle soul, someone who believes with all their being that mamas and babies are meant to be loved, supported and empowered to have a healthy childbirth, by whatever means is best for them.Consequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
I am so motivated to work to improve maternity care in the U.S. that it's almost overwhelming to think of the obstacles that face us birth activists. We are up against public opinion ("You don't have to be a hero, why wouldn't you want an epidural"), general ignorance of the birth process ("You could never have given birth to this baby vaginally"), an insurance industry that has de-personalized every bit of the medical business, and careproviders that at best are too busy to offer the scope of services they want to, and at worst are convinced that there is nothing wrong with the system and that women's bodies are broken or incapable of natural birth. I want to be part of a thriving, growing, healthy community of people who trust birth, love birth, trust women, love women, trust babies and love babies. I think we can get there, but to change the culture around birth practices in the healthcare industry is going to take a lot of energy, voices, letters, phone calls, votes and motivation to keep trying to fix it even when we are defeated in a battle for birth choices (like NYC right now).Anything Else that you would like us to know about you:
I look for joy and hope in the largest schemes and the smallest circles. Even if you don't know what to say, be an example. Walk the walk, and people will watch, learn and respect you. Be strong, because some force will always try to knock you down. It's all worth the effort in the end, when you hold a precious newborn and whisper in his ear, "Welcome. You are loved."Thank you, Michelle, for your wonderful knitted breasts, and for your contribution to the world of breastfeeding, birthing, and parenting!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must let me know (by way of comment) how you (the doula) or how your doula (as someone entering for their doula) would be able to use these breasts. It can be a serious use, a comical or humorous use, or a creative use.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.
- For an additional entry, visit her business website, then give her some feedback on her website, what you like about it, what you think of her offerings, etc... in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
5.09.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #9
Lisa is a dynamic artist who pulls at my heart strings, both through her works and through our interview. Be sure to check out her blog to get to know her better, otherwise, enjoy getting to know this mama on Mother's Day.I am a mommy to two magical little girls and a mixed media artist. I am very bad
at the practical but I'm really good at the magical things in life!
I've always loved Art and always dreamed of pursuing it someday. When my first
daughter was born I was blessed with the option to stay home with her and she
became my little muse.I had sort of an explosion of creativity that has evolved
over the years into my paintings. I can't imagine doing anything else!
My daughters definately make my heart skip a beat,h old my breath and
sigh with happiness! Thay are my inspiration, my heart and soul. I would
never be who I am without them. They teach me unconditional love, patience and
strength. They teach me to see the magic in everyday things and to live in this
moment.
If you had to choose one item that you sell, what is your favorite and why:
When you think of a doula, what do you think:Thats a really hard question. They all represent a diffrent emotion or time in
my life. If I had to choose it would have to be 'I Loved You Before I Ever Met
You'. My mother passed away when I was 6 so when I was little I would imagine
what kind of mom I would love to have. She would be loving and kind,silly and spontaneous,creative and fun and her favorite thing to do would be to spend time with me. I was not fortunate enough to have her but I was fortunate enough to become her to my little girls. This painting represents that to me.
I actually had a doula for my first pregnancy. I was so comforted by the thoughtConsequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
of having someone with me to help make this beautiful experience exactly
that, beautiful. Women supporting women is wonderful in itself and to have
someone you trust to help you through the sometimes scary moments and be
your strenghth is a sacred thing. When I think of a doula i think of
strength and sisterhood.
I am a little saddened by the birth practices in the U.S. right now. I truly
believe that the birth of a child can be one of the most empowering, beautiful
experiences a woman can go through if treated as a natural proccess that are
bodies where created to do. I feel that the medical community sometimes treats
pregnancy as an illness. We need to be able to trust our bodies and the people
that will help us deliver our babies.
Lisa, thank you for donating such a beautiful and meaningful piece to our giveaway!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
Entries will be closed on May 29th, at midnight, and the drawing will occur on May 31st, at noon.
Happy entering and Happy Mother's Day!!!
5.07.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #8
Sarah McKay is one of three doulas within the cooperative, 9 Months & Beyond. Sarah contacted me to be a part of the giveaway and has offered the very cool, and very different prize of $100 off of a birth tub rental! 
They ship anywhere within the continental U.S. and have both The AquaDoula and the Birth Pool In A Box.You may want to seek the advice of your birth attendant, doula, friends who have birthed in water and of course, Waterbirth International for information on which tub is right for you. Of course whatever tub you think you will be most comfortable in is a very important factor!
They provide a BASIC birth tub kit for tub use which includes everything needed EXCEPT a sterile drinking safe garden or RV hose to be purchased at local hardware store.
Renting from 9 Months & Beyond, LLC means:
- An Experienced waterbirth mom and dad team supporting your family
- Local ownership and service (Tennessee clients)
- Front door one way UPS shipping (included in rental fee)
- All equipment provided (except clean garden hose)
- Choice of two tubs: heated and inflatable
- Choice of RENT or PURCHASE
- Best price (cheaper than any online retail/rental website!)
Sarah is a personal friend of mine, but it was still a delight to hear her responses to my questions and I invite you to become more acquainted with Sarah and 9 Months & Beyond!
I'm a self-proclaimed coffee addict, but then again, what mom isn't? I have 6 children – 3 by birth, 3 by plane, a fantastically wonderful husband, and the laziest basset hound you've ever seen. I'm a doula, childbirth educator, and lactation educator who has the pleasure of working with the greatest group of women anywhere! Oh, and I enjoy long walks on the beach and a good margarita. (Again, what mom doesn't?) I have dreams of someday retiring on an island with said hubby and lazy dog (we all know the dog won't live that long), and will appreciate the occasional visits from my children and any grandchildren I may be blessed to have the opportunity to spoil.What makes your heart skip a beat, hold your breath, or sigh with happiness:
The laughter of my children – especially when they're laughing together. Siblings naturally spend so much time being competitive, so hearing them giggle together and enjoy each other makes my heart smile.
I became a mother at the ripe old age of 19, in less than ideal circumstances. My birth experience was far from beautiful. By the time my second child was born, eight years later, I was much more educated, and in an entirely different place in my life. I understood that I was in charge of my care, and had the confidence to make better decisions – including choosing a supportive care provider. Her birth was as close to perfect as I could have imagined – fast, unmedicated, easy, although a bit chaotic. The night and day comparison of my first and second births sparked a desire to show others the difference that a little education and confidence can make. So, when I was finished with birthing my own babies, I went searching for how to feed my passion for all things pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding related. It still amazes me that I actually get paid to do this!When you think of a doula, what do you think:
The first birth I was hired to attend as a certified doula was with a lovely couple preparing to welcome their second child. They shared with me their first experience, and spoke very highly of the doula that had supported them. I thought it would be good to talk with her, with their permission of course. I contacted her, and we immediately hit it off. Little did I know that this would lead to my involvement with and eventual ownership of 9 Months & Beyond. I am honored to call her friend, and consider her to be a huge blessing in my life.
Advocate. Educator. Sounding board. Non-judgmental, unconditional support. I see doulas as the tour guides – pointing out all the sights and attractions along the families journey to parenthood.Consequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
I think the statistics speak for themselves. We intervene more, but the outcomes are no better. I meet women every day that are blind to the fact that they have options, and that is disappointing. I would love to see some research on the long term physical effects of common interventions. Animals adapt to their environments, so I wonder if our bodies will eventually adapt to truly needing these interventions in order to give birth. Maybe, before I retire to my island, I'll do some of that research. Until then, I encourage all birthing women to learn the meaning of informed consent and informed refusal.
Thank you for donating a $100 gift certificate to our celebration, and thank you, 9 Months & Beyond, for making such a great difference in the birth practices of middle Tennessee.
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
Entries will be closed on May 29th, at midnight, and the drawing will occur on May 31st, at noon.
5.06.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #7
Emily, the owner of Lullaby Slings, has a shop full of Mei Tai, Ring, and doll slings. In addition, she has burp clothes and baby scale slings and has donated a beautiful Midwifery Baby Scale Sling/Hammock for our Doula Month Giveaway. This prize would be perfect for a doula who is aspiring to be a midwife, a midwife apprentice, or a doula who attends homebirths on a regular basis!
Weigh those babies in style! This mini sling (approximately 22" x 42") is made of soft flannel, double seamed to strong aluminum rings. It can be used with standard midwifery spring scales.This sling is made of flannel printed with baby jungle animals and can be seen in picture on her etsy store!
Emily, like so many SBO's, started their business based on a need or personal experience. I enjoyed reading her answers to my interview questions and hope that you enjoy learning more about her as well!
My name is Emily, and I'm 28 years old. My husband and I have been married for seven years, and in that time we've been blessed with three little boys (ages 5, 3, and 1). Before starting a family I was a high school choral conductor, and I keep my toes in that world through volunteer directing of student and alumni groups. I enjoy reading, gardening, sewing, and creating messes in the kitchen. Giving birth to my children has given me a great interest in childbirth education and birth advocacy. I am almost finished with my training for doula certification, and am loving serving women through their labors and births.What makes your heart skip a beat, hold your breath, or sigh with happiness:
My first son was a challenging baby. He needed to be held nearly constantly, often even while sleeping. Babywearing was a life saver for me! I used a variety of different carriers and eventually decided to start sewing my own versions of my favorites. I realized that I could help other moms by sewing slings when a friend of mine asked if she could buy the one I was wearing! It gives me great joy to create beautiful slings, especially knowing how much ease they can bring to a new mother's life.
...I don't remember where the quote originally comes from, but I love the idea that a doula is the person who is there to "mother the mother". Childbearing is such hard work, so intense, so beautiful, and so full of emotions. I think that a doula is there to walk alongside the mother, loving her, assisting her as she needs and wants, while she finds her path through labor.
In general, I think that birth practices currently standard in the U.S. make it very difficult for a mother to have a simple, self-directed, and safe birth. This is particularly true in hospitals, where standard "protocol" is one-size-fits-all, often regardless of the specific needs or wishes of the mother. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule (and I am glad of it!) but generally it is hard to be a woman in labor in a U.S. hospital.
I am grateful that (in most states) we have the choice for homebirth available to us. I am also grateful for the doulas who work to help women who choose hospital births (for many and varied reasons) to have a better experience there.
In the future, I hope to see more midwifery, more home births, more free-standing birth centers, and far fewer cesareans. (I can dream, right?) :)
Jonathan's freckles, Thomas' smile, and Josiah's sweetness when he lays his head on my shoulder before bedtime.If you had to choose one item that you sell, what is your favorite and why:
A batik ring sling. I love the batik fabrics and ring slings are what started me on this endeavor in the first place. They're easy, versatile, and the one thing that I tell all new mothers they absolutely MUST have for the baby. :)Emily invites everyone to visit her at Laundry and Lullabies - a blog that chronicles the adventures of parenting little boys, with a variety of notes on birth, nutrition, faith, gardening, and frugality thrown in for good measure!
Thanks again Emily!
RULES FOR ENTERING:
Remember, EACH OF THESE count as one entry. You have to complete the first entry to be able to be able to have the other entries counted. To have them counted as one entry each, they must each be fulfilled with their own, separate, comment. Be sure that your comment contains your email either in the body of the message, or through your profile.
- For your initial entry, you must visit her etsy store, then come back and let me know which is your favorite item and why in a comment.
- For an additional entry, post a link to this giveaway on your FB OR create your own blog post regarding this giveaway, with a link to this post, then comment with a link back to your blog post/FB post.. Then, copy and paste a link to that in a comment here on my blog.
- For an additional entry, visit her blog, then let me know which post you enjoyed and why in a comment here on my blog.
- If you took advantage of the Early Bird Entries, you can add any/all of your Early Bird entries to this giveaway by commenting with the words "EB Entry".
Happy entering!!!
5.05.2010
Int'l Doula Month - Giveaway #6
Jessica, over at Vulva Love Lovely, has provided our next donation to International Doula Month Giveaway. Interviewing her made me laugh out loud, and cry with understanding! Her story is powerful, and I am happy to support her store through our giveaway as her passion and reason behind her art work speaks to multitudes of women!
She has provided a lip balm for the giveaway, which is, as you guessed, for your 'lips'! :)
Jessica, thank you for your honest and witty answers, and thank you for bringing your body positive products to the world of women!Tell us a little about yourself:
I have an addiction to chocolate soy milk.How did you get into this line of work:
When I was in high school I was more than an outcast, I was an untouchable. I was never good enough for anyone. Those closest to me flip flopped between my being too fat, too thin, always worried about what I looked like, worried why I didn’t look like the other girls…. From what I could tell, sex made you popular. It seemed that being accepted was more important than anything else. I sought out sex and found it in all of the wrong places. I was taken advantage of by older men and was used by the boys in school, it was horrible. In keeping the company I did, I found myself in abusive relationships and humiliating, dehumanizing sexual encounters. I went to a Catholic school where we were taught abstinence only sex ed, so I had no idea how truly easy it was to get STD’s, to become pregnant, and all of the other extra’s that go along with irresponsible sex. All of it hurt and many of the scars from those consequences will follow me for the rest of my life. All of that and in the end it didn’t matter. I was still an outcast.
For a long time I didn't think about my Vagina, to avoid feeling all of the things that you feel after all of that. Whenever I thought of my Vagina in any context, I got this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I felt dirty, I felt useless, I felt ashamed and I felt used, thrown away, I felt like a piece of garbage. Death, sadness and humiliation all lingered there.What makes your heart skip a beat, hold your breath, or sigh with happiness:
Last year a friend of mine asked me to see the Vagina Monologues. I thought it was going to be funny, like a big Vagina joke, so I agreed. Then I saw all of these women who were proud enough of their Vaginas to get up in front of a room of people and say it. I was horribly jealous. I wanted what they had. Soon, I realized what they had was a Vagina. I have one of those too. There was nothing wrong with my Vagina and it didn’t need anyone's approval! I started making these things to help get out my frustration, then to celebrate my Vagina, now to take it back. Its mine now.
I hope that my work will inspire all of you to look at women differently, and to heal your own soul, because I know that we are all wounded in one way or another.
In all honesty, my dog. He makes me the happiest person in the world. That and The Beatles.If you had to choose one item that you sell, what is your favorite and why:
Any of my Vulva Pendants. The first thing I made to help myself heal was my portrait pendant, and it changed my life. Im very emotionally linked to each and every pendant I make.When you think of a doula, what do you think:
I think of a sister.Consequentially, what do you think of birth practices in the U.S. right now:
I cant really say for sure as I have not yet given birth or really given any serious thought into doing it in the near future. I will only just be getting married this December. I can say this: I know enough that I want a home birth. My fiance is in med school, so I will have a doctor there. So, I suppose I think that a natural birth is very important, and equally important is having a doc there if anything goes wrong. Working for a Doula I can say that both doulas and doctors need to show more respect for one another. They need to work with each other, not against each other. I can dream.Anything Else that you would like us to know about you:
All you birthin Diva's rock my Uterus, so from my Uterus to yours: may your births be peaceful.
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A Victorious VBAC!
Hannah Kate Brooks
Born November 2nd, 2009 @ 42 weeks & 2 days
9 pounds, 14 ounces
21.75in long
The night before Hannah was born I felt so defeated. I was heading into an induction the next morning. One I didn‘t want. I believed my body knew how to go into labor on its own…but… it hadn‘t… and I didn‘t really have any other options at this point. I was 42weeks and 2 days, 16 days post date, and my baby just wouldn’t come out. We had tried EVERYTHING. I put off going to bed, holding out to go into labor sometime before my 6am date with Pitocin. I didn’t go to bed until after midnight, and when I did, I went and got my sweet sleeping Jaron out of his bed and snuggled him up in mine. I don’t think I prayed anything. I’d prayed for most of my pregnancy that God would prepare my heart for the birth I would have, and I sure didn’t feel peaceful about what was about to happen. I had a heavy dreadful feeling that I would end up with another c-section, and I’d be the one to blame, for going into an induction I didn’t want to have.
I don’t know when I went to sleep, but I woke up at 3am and realized that I’d forgotten to print out my bible verses I’d collected a couple of months before. My intention had been to have them to meditate on during labor, and I knew now more than ever I’d need them. I was surprised that in all my planning and preparing over the last month, that I hadn’t thought to print them.
Since my mom was asleep in the room where the printer is, I decided to write them out on post-its. That would be easier to use at the hospital anyway. As I pulled them up in the quiet, I willed the clock to stop or my water to break- something. I didn’t want to be in this day, in this situation.
As I started reading the verses, praying them, I realized that all of them were perfect for how I was feeling. They were about not being fearful, how we’re alone in time of trouble, etc...I stopped and wondered: why would I have chosen these? Months ago I was certain that I’d have a beautiful home birth. I wasn’t afraid of that. I hadn’t anticipated being fearful or having things go wrong. I had been encouraged, empowered, and certain. Why would I have chosen these? I just kept reading them, writing them, praying them. It became clear to me that these verses had been chosen with this very situation in mind. I hadn’t known that I’d be here, but Someone had. When I finished, I tucked my tear stained post-its into my purse, knowing that they had already served their purpose, and probably wouldn’t be needed again today. I went and got in the shower, feeling peaceful. I wasn’t excited that this was what I had to do. I wasn’t glad. I wished it wasn’t. But it was, and somehow, I would get through it. I wasn’t alone.
5:35am - I kissed Jaron’s sweaty sleepy head, and we left. I texted Delilah to tell her we were on our way after we picked up some breakfast. She said she’d meet us there. TJ and I chatted on the ride. It wasn’t the “dead man walking” atmosphere I had imagined the night before, or even that I’d felt when I’d first awoke. We talked about what the baby would look like, how big she would be, what we might name her; we even joked about what the hospital would say if we showed up late: “Oh sorry, you can’t have your baby today. Go home.” Wouldn’t that be nice?
6:05- When we got to the hospital we had no idea which entrance to go into, where to go, etc… TJ suggested going to admissions, but I knew better and led us to L&D. We were quickly ushered into a room, and I had an I-told-you-so comment for TJ. They must not have been busy because 3 nurses came and hung out in the room with us, joking about how big I was and was I sure it wasn‘t twins. They poked fun that I’d chosen an orange shirt, and didn’t I know Halloween had already passed?? We all laughed that my October baby would be a November baby. Then they realized we hadn’t pre-registered, so they sent us back down to do that. TJ’s I-told-you-so moment. While we filled out paper work, Delilah texted that she was in the parking lot, going over my birth plan and praying, and would be right up. My spirits rose a little remembering that I wasn’t the only one praying, and so thankful that she would be here. I remember being highly annoyed that the girl at the desk sounded like she was coughing up a lung. I bathed T and I both in hand sanitizer when we left her desk. When we got back to the room, Delilah was on her way up. The nurse handed me the hospital gown and pointed to the bathroom. I took a breath, knowing that this would be the first of many “battles” today. I felt like I’d have to have my guard up all day, ready to fight for any shred of the birth that I wanted. I calmly said that I would prefer to stay in my own clothes for a while, expecting an argument. To my surprise, she said “Okay!” and that was it. I felt myself relax just a little… maybe this wouldn’t be quite so bad… In the next hour I answered questions, signed forms, got blood drawn, got hooked to monitors, etc...
7:15- Dr. Downey came in. He suggested breaking my water to start things off, but I just didn’t feel at peace about that yet. He was agreeable, much to my relief. We agreed to start the Pitocin at 1, and go up by 1 every half hour, and I said I’d probably be ready to break my water after I had a good contraction pattern going. He agreed with my request to try and turn Pit off once contractions were coming good. Off he went.
7:40- Got my IV. Ouch. It bothered me ALL DAY. We had to send TJ out to the car to bring up my stuff so I could put on my nursing bra and strapless wrap top before they could start the IV. Something about since my tank didn’t open in the back and would have to go over my head and we wouldn’t be able to get it off if we needed to. Ok.
8:02- Pit started at 1. Now we wait. Nurse Alice checked me and she thought I was 2cm, 70% effaced. I started to get upset since Kathleen had thought I was 3cm, 90% for the last 2 weeks, but Delilah assured me that it’s just a difference in the person that’s checking, and that it didn’t really matter.
8:55- Had the first contraction of the day. I was not optimistic. It was much milder than those that I’d been having at home for the last several weeks.
For the next several hours we just sat around, watching TV, chatting, and me sneaking bites of whatever T was snacking on. I tried not to be discouraged, but the contractions that I had were not nearly as strong, or close together, or consistent, as they’d been at home. I tried to not think about it. Mostly, we were just bored.
12:35- Dr. Downey stopped by. He checked me, 3cm, 80%, 0 station. Pretty much the same as Kat had said for weeks. I realized that my hope for a late afternoon baby and a visit from Jaron in the evening was probably not going to happen. Still didn’t want to break my water, and he was fine with that. At this point the Pit was at 10 and contractions were about 3 minutes apart, but very mild. I decided to try and nap while I could. Delilah agreed and laughed since the IV was still bothering me more than the contractions.
Around 2pm the contractions were 4 minutes apart, and Alice came in and upped my Pitocin to 11. That’s as high as it would ever go. Apparently, a typical non-VBAC induction starts at 6 and goes up by 6 every 20 minutes, so at the end of the first hour, the typical inductee is at 24. It took 6 hours to get me to 11, and that‘s all it took. I feel like that’s another affirmation that my body was SO close to doing this on its own. The contractions were getting un-comfy, mostly in my low back, but I was still talking and texting during them. I was in the rocking chair now, and T was napping on the bed. Delilah was on the couch. We alternated between chatting, and sitting in the quiet, me on Facebook, and she, I think, was reading.
2:45- Delilah points out that during contractions I’ve started closing my eyes and breathing, and I stop rocking. She’s right, and I start to wonder if maybe things are finally starting to get somewhere. It’s very calm and quiet in the room, and I like it. I wish that the baby would stay on the monitor so Alice wouldn’t have to keep coming in and messing with me. Actually, what I really wished was that I didn’t have the stupid things on in the first place.
2:53- Alice comes in and is happy with contraction pattern. Baby looks great, and we talk about that blood pressure cuff that keeps cutting off the circulation to my arm ever 15 minutes. T is still snoozing. I take a picture of him with my phone and send it to Ashley. She sends back a text joking about him being a great coach-Ha!
About 3:30 I tell Delilah we should play cards or something. Sitting around all day has gotten boring; I’m getting antsy, and trying not to get emotional. I get up to go pee, and when I get back I’m feeling shaky, so I decide to eat a granola bar. I still am not sure why we didn’t get the cards out! That would have been a cute picture…
About 4pm. I’m stopping and breathing during contractions. They’re hurting my back. I still know that I’ve had stronger ones at home, but these are more consistent, and maybe, just maybe, they mean we’re getting somewhere. Delilah starts talking about whether or not she should go get food now, or later. After a contraction, I just start crying. I’m not going to see Jaron until tomorrow. We’ve never been apart for this long, and never overnight. I miss him. Then I feel silly for crying about it and laugh. Delilah comments to TJ that irrationally emotional is a great sign, and she’s going to get food now rather than later.
4:42- Delilah is back with..? I can‘t remember what it was, but it smelled yummy. Kind of want to fight her for it, but I restrain myself. J
4:50-Kathleen arrives. I’m on the bed again, trying to rest. We all chat for a few minutes, and Kat messes with the monitors trying to get baby to show up better so that the nurse will leave us alone.
5:28- Dr. Downey is here. I am hopeful that we’ve had some change since the last hour or so has been getting increasingly more convincing. We talk about breaking my water, and I say let’s see where my cervix is. I was SO disappointed to hear that it had made NO change! I’d been here for almost 12 hours and I was still exactly where I was 2 weeks ago. I want to cry. I want to go home. Mostly, I want to scream at my baby “GET OUT!” I’m becoming afraid that I’m looking at a failed induction, even though no one acts worried in the slightest. I’m pretty sure that everyone was hoping I’d let him break my water though. Nobody wanted to sit here for 4 days waiting for my cervix to decide to do anything. Kathleen says she thinks it’s a good idea. Dr. Downey thinks it’s a good idea. I think I probably should want to. But I just am not ready. My heart is not ready to do that. I wanted to feel the peace about it that I’d felt this morning about the Pitocin, and I didn’t feel that yet. I was certain that when the time was right, God would show me. Dr. Downey agrees, but I can tell he thinks I’m being silly. When he leaves, Kathleen goes with him. She told me later that he told her he’d let me go all night like this if that’s what I want. I’m so incredibly grateful for his patience and calm presence. It was such a blessing to not feel pressured. She told him that we had to have a vaginal birth, and he said he knew and that he felt like we would. Kathleen told him to say a prayer that my water breaks on its own.
5:51- I’m laying on the bed, talking to Delilah, Kat, and TJ about the pros and cons of having my water broken. All of a sudden I feel a POP, and I yell out and grab my belly. For a split second I thought that my scar had popped open, but I had no pain so I immediately threw that thought out. Nothing happened. Everyone in the room had jumped up and was asking me if it were my water, did I have pain, etc… I assured them it wasn’t my water because nothing was coming out. Nothing had happened. We decided that it must have been a really strong punch or something. Very weird. I chuckle and start to sit up, and GUSH; there is a TON of warm fluid. I laugh and say “Oh, I guess it was my water! There’s a ton of it!” Everyone jumps up and wants to see! MUCH to my surprise the fluid was clear! I’d been told to expect Meconium from my 42+ week baby, but there wasn’t. That really made me feel good because I knew that’d let the staff relax a little. I’d been worried about it. God is merciful.
-Next contraction- WHOA. Big difference. Delilah jumped up and said “NOW we’re in labor!!”
5:58- I’d had two contractions post rupture of membranes and I said “Okay. Now they hurt.” I even sent a text to Ashley and my mom “Okay, they just went from ‘eh, that kinda hurts’ to ‘holy crap that hurts’”
6:01- Kat set the head of the bed up at a 90 degree angle and I leaned over that on my knees. I think that was probably my favorite position the whole birth, as I kept going back to it. I was surprised at how little I noticed pain in my belly, where I’d expected it, and how much my back hurt. I was feeling shaky and just really overwhelmed with the sudden change. In a matter of minutes we’d gone from laying around chatting and watching TV to being in active labor. I felt SUCH relief that I hadn’t let Dr. Downey break my water. We all knew that God had just worked in the room, and that‘s a cool feeling. I feel like He had said “Hey! I‘m here! Let’s have a baby! “Delilah came over, gave me a hug, and said, “This is what we’ve been waiting for, this is what we wanted!” So I cried happy and relieved tears, and then got on with the job at hand- I was having a baby today!
6:17- Someone suggested a popsicle, and I decided that sounded pretty good. Delilah asked me who leave the room for it, and my response was “NOT YOU,” I don’t even know who she sent…but she was such a calm and reassuring presence, I needed her to not leave me. I had a red popsicle. It was cold, which I liked. I don’t know how many contractions it took to eat the thing, but I remember TJ holding a Styrofoam cup in one hand, and was feeding me the popsicle with the other hand. Then he’d put it in the cup during contractions. Good system babe!
6:23- Now I was leaning over the end of the bed and Delilah and TJ were really working at trying to help with my back. Delilah was great about doing counter pressure. TJ really wanted to help, but so far, he hadn’t caught on. I really wanted to tell him to just leave me alone because he was doing it wrong, but I appreciated his effort, so I tried to coach in between contractions what wasn’t working, what might help, etc… I think Delilah finally told him to stop asking me “Like that? Right there? Higher? Lower? Am I hurting you?” Thank goodness. TJ just didn’t want to push as hard as he needed to I think, or his hands were too big, or something, but bless his heart he was trying so hard. She was so patient with him, trying to help him figure out what I needed, and balancing that with wanting to help me too. I just wanted to cry. While they were messing around back there trying to figure out what they were doing, I was having contractions. Hello! Would he just let her do it already?? Even in the middle of being frustrated, I was taken aback by his willingness and desire to help. That’s love, and I thought distinctly “He really does love me a lot!” Ha, what a strange thing to think mid labor, right?
6:30- the new nurse Rachel came in and disconnected the Pit line and gave me a saline lock. It didn’t stop the annoying pain in my arm, but it was one less wire to drag around, so I was thankful!
6:35- Up until about now I’d been texting (mom and Ashley and maybe Jena? I can’t remember) between contractions. They were so excited to FINALLY know that something was happening. I am not sure when I stopped responding and someone took my phone and put it on silent, but my guess is around this point because I also ordered the TV turned off. It was awfully noisy in my room, and My Name Is Earl is a really obnoxious show, and I just wanted it off. In my head my request sounded like “Hey, can we turn that off please?” but it came out more like “Teej. Turn THAT off.” Whoops…
6:48- Kathleen left to meet… her sister I think?… for dinner. It was Kathleen’s birthday, and she was pretty excited to possibly share her birthday with this much awaited baby! I don’t know that anyone expected a baby before midnight. After all, I’d been that same 3cm for weeks. I expected early next morning.
6:53-I tried squatting. It really didn’t feel great, but I thought it might help push her down more, which after all is the goal right? I did that for about 2 contractions and then was done with that. Ha. I tried kneeling on the floor instead and leaning over the foot of the bed… Why I didn’t just climb onto the bed and lean over the head of the bed like I’d been doing, I don’t know. TJ and Delilah rushing around to get a pillow for my knees, or something to kneel on so I wasn’t on the germy floor, and I was thinking that I could care less about the floor right now. Like I cared about germs right now?? And I KNEW they were doing that because I’m typically such a germ freak and had even talked about it in my birth plan…but man, I was SO did not care. I appreciated their vigilance though, because probably looking back I would have been totally grossed out if they hadn’t done that. I laugh now, but at the time that I’d thought that I would care… I really didn’t. When they got that settled they went back to the counter pressure. They seemed to have a system figured out where they both were doing something, and it was working for me. Whoo hoo!
7:18- Now this cracks me up. I have no memory of this, but Delilah’s notes say that the nurse came in and was talking about forceps and rectal tears?? HA! SO glad I didn’t hear that!! I would have run for the hills I think!
7:39- I was leaning on TJ. He was kneeling on the floor and I was basically hanging over his head. He didn’t complain then (smart man), but later when he saw the picture of us like that he said “THAT HURT SO BAD!” Ha, sorry babe! After we abandoned that, Delilah was trying to figure out where I needed the pressure now (it kept moving, darn it!) on my back. Basically she ended up pushing on either side of my tailbone. It really helped, and bless her for being willing to do it. After that contraction we had a good laugh about how in her next childbirth class she would say “And then there was this weird lady who wanted me to push my fists up her butt!” Hahaha….maybe you had to be there. I still to this day do not know why my back hurt so much. Kathleen assures me that Hannah was in perfect position. Who knows, but that’s the only thing I remember about the contractions. I don’t remember them feeling like cramps. I don’t remember noticing anything up front. It was all in my low back/sacrum/tail bone area. My guess is that I had a 10 pound baby head butting her way through there? J
7:50- I moved back to the kneeling position over the head of the bed.
8:02- Kat got back from dinner.
8:06- I decided I was cold, so they put a blanket around my shoulders. I think we ended up pulling it off during contractions, and then putting it back between. I realized I was TIRED and thirsty. It was quiet in the room and I announced “I want Pepsi!” Everyone laughed, Kathleen teased that TJ looked like he needed a Pepsi…with a straw… and I snuck a few sips of Pepsi. Ahhhh… it was awesome.
8:18- Delilah suggested that even though this position was working for me, maybe I should try side lying again so I could rest, and Kathleen could assess the position of the baby. I REALLY didn’t want to. Laying down hurt! But she assured me that I’d find my groove after a few contractions… so I slowly complied. I moved so slowly in labor. It did feel good to rest in between, but the contractions were definitely harder that way. I felt myself start to get a little discouraged because it was only 8, only 2 hours since my water broke, and I was working really hard. I knew I was tired and I probably had many many hours left to go. So I did my best to rest between the contractions, and to try and calm my mind. Over the next 30 minutes things got harder and more intense. I thought it was my position maybe. I remember at one point hearing Delilah and TJ say that the last 2 hours had gone by really fast, and I just thought “yea, but we have a long way to go, so don’t get too excited there.”
8:50- TJ got the rice sock and they tried that on my back. The warmth felt good, but really, nothing was helping much anymore. I was feeling increasingly overwhelmed. This had gotten really intense, and I was so tired. I recognized my emotions as looking a lot like transition, but I knew it had only been a few hours, and after weeks of being 3cm, there was no way I was actually that far already. I knew I just must be a big wimp and I really needed to get it together or I would never survive this. I had to get up off that blasted bed so I decided it was time for a pee break. On my way up (why is it so hard to MOVE when you’re in labor?? It was such an effort to get up…) I had 2 contractions, and ended up back to my favorite, kneeling over the head of the bed. Being upright like that made the contractions more intense, and I was shocked to feel my body try and give a little push at the peak of the contraction! I didn’t tell anyone, certain they’d tell me it was too soon. I was in my head: Okay really Kirst. Get a grip! You can NOT let your body do that. You’ll swell your cervix and then the baby will never come out and you’ll have a C-Section, so get a grip already! Things are going to get a lot worse before they get better. Get a hold of yourself!
9:02-TJ got me to the bathroom. I made him shut the door best he could. He said “You’re doing so good babe.” I said “How do you know??? No I’m not. I’m losing it! This is hard. I don’t want to do this anymore. I just want her to get OUT.” (Again… Transition anyone? Nah, not me…). TJ told me later that even HE recognized that I was in transition… I’m pretty sure everyone knew it but me. A few contractions later (and no pee), Delilah stuck her head around the door and said “Kirst? Are you feeling like you want to push??” I knew they‘d heard me grunting at the top of contractions, trying my best to calm myself down, knowing that if I‘d just get a grip, my body would stop trying to do that. I answered. “Yes! *crying* and it’s too soon!” Kathleen checked me on the toilet and said her guess was 7-8cm. I thought “yea right.” Ha! I was holding on to that denial for all it was worth.
9:26- I was doing the slow dancing thing with Delilah. I’m so sad I don’t have a picture of her and me working together, because she was so much a part of this birth. I said something about thank goodness she was short like me so we could do that. TJ is way too tall for that. They were trying to convince me that it was okay to let my body push if it wanted to, and that maybe I should get checked. They were all sure I was farther than I thought I was. I protested, but finally said ok.
9:29- Nurse Rolanda checked. She said 8cm. Everyone else thought that was great. In my mind I was thinking 2 WHOLE MORE CM TO GO. I don’t want to. I want to go home. I changed my mind; I don’t want to have a baby anymore. She said something about getting in stirrups to push because if I wasn’t the shoulders would get stuck. WHY do nurses say such negative things like that to women in labor?? So stupid. And furthermore, why do they wear so much perfume?? Good golly. I decided then and there I wasn’t getting in that bed. Ha. I was so in my head.
9:35- It seemed like a crew of people showed up, started making noise, turning on lights, setting things up, etc… I was still just working contraction to contraction, appreciating the fact that I thought it seemed like the breaks between were getting a little longer. I kind of wondered why they were all in there already… didn’t they know we had all night? They must still not be busy. I wanted to kneel over the head of the bed again.
9:45- Somehow they convinced me to get on my left side. I really didn’t want to. I think the nurse wanted to see me push. Then she announced she was calling Dr. Downey. I was still in denial, thinking it couldn’t possibly be time to be feeling like pushing, but by golly, it was getting really hard to fight it. Delilah started the perineal herbs. I just kept saying I wanted off the bed because I didn’t want to tear.
10:09- Dr. Downey was there.
10:12- He wanted me to bear down while lying on my side. I did halfheartedly. I didn’t want to tear, and really? It’s only been 5 hours. They must have all lost their minds… but you know, the breaks between contractions ARE longer. I heard myself snore in between contractions once! I realized I was listening to a conversation about my needing to pee, or my bladder being in the way, maybe they’d do a catheter? Heck no! I’ll go to the bathroom thankyouverymuch. Delilah announced we were going to the bathroom, alone, and shut the door behind her.
Delilah’s Ultimate Pep-Talk. It went something like this: “Kirst. Did you see everyone out there? They’re all out there getting stuff ready because they’re expecting you to come out of here and push your baby out. Vaginally. This is what you want. You’re getting it! Your baby is coming out. Your body is telling you it’s time, it’s telling you to push. I know your back hurts, so push her out. Then your back won’t hurt anymore! So let’s have a baby!”
Bless her for knowing that that was what I needed; something to calm me and focus me. There was so much going on out there, and so much in my head, but when she took me in the bathroom, everything finally got quiet, and I could focus, and breathe a little, and wrap my brain around what I needed to do. I finally let myself believe that this was actually happening. It felt surreal. I let my body push, and man did it ever push. I’m still amazed at how intense that feeling was. I’d always thought the “urge to push” probably felt like, hmm, I feel like I need to bear down. But it was so involuntary and intense. I don’t really know how people can be ‘good’ or ‘bad’ pushers… I didn’t feel like I had any control over it, which was another reason I was so afraid I was going to tear. I thought to myself, if I could keep myself quieter, they wouldn’t realize what was going on, and maybe I could just push her out in the bathroom, and Delilah could catch her, and we would just sit in here, holding the baby in the quiet. It’d be our little secret. After a few contractions, and obvious pushing sounds coming from the bathroom, someone came and told us to get off the toilet. I think it was Kathleen, but I don’t remember. I think it was about 10:30. It was slow moving from the bathroom to the bed. I wanted to delay that as long as possible.
10:36- As I got to the foot of the bed, pushing, Kathleen looked and said “OH yea we have a head!” Crowning!? Already!? Awesome! That means I’m almost done! That made the climb onto the bed rather interesting though! It seems like I pushed twice once I was on the bed (and no my feet weren’t in stirrups- so there nurse.) I KNEW I was going to tear. I even tried to reach down there and help them hold everything together. Ha! They asked me if I wanted a mirror and I said, “NO!“ thinking that there was no way I wanted to watch myself rip in half. Looking back now I think that’s something I would like to do next time. TJ says it was really cool to watch her slowly emerge, and I am sorry I declined the chance to see it. I looked up and saw Delilah standing behind Kathleen, camera in air, aimed and ready. Wow, everyone can see my bits can’t they? D smiled and nodded at me, and I pushed again. As always, calm and reassuring. She was like my security blanket. TJ said, “I can see her head babe! It’s so cool! You’re almost there! “
Once her head came out, they laid the head of the bed back and Dr. Downey looked and me and very calmly said “Push.”
So I did! Kathleen was pushing up by my pubic bone, and Dr. Downey was maneuvering her shoulders. She wasn’t stuck, but she was a big baby. I remember surprising myself with a final roar as she slithered out! I did end up with a 2nd degree tear that Kathleen said was caused by her shoulders, not her head. TJ seemed so amazed at what had just happened, as was I!
10:40- Hannah Kate is born! We did it! Teej? Did you see that!? Thank you Lord! She was placed immediately on my chest, and she was such a beautiful sight to see! FINALLY we meet baby girl!
Hannah started rooting around and latched within 15 minutes of her birth. I was amazed! She never left my chest. The nursery Nazi, as I lovingly called her behind her back (really…she was intense. She said things like the baby was “bigger than normal“and she had “been in too long“… as if Hannah had some sort of issue or problem, which she didn’t. She was PERFECT), kept trying to take Hannah because she thought she was “cold” but I assured her I would keep her warm, and Kathleen told her to go get some warm blankets instead of taking her. Kathleen was great at redirecting the nurses and keeping them away as much as possible. I’m glad she was there to help deliver, and to help run interference with the nurses who acted pretty annoyed that Kat was there.
Hannah was, and is, PERFECT. I held her and she nursed until 11:09 when I told Kathleen I was ready for HER to get her weight- another thing that annoyed the nursery Nazi I‘m sure. But I was in love with the control I had. It was MY baby and no one was doing anything to her that I didn’t agree to or supervise. It was my idea, and it only happened when I was ready to let her go. We all took guesses about her weight. Everyone was saying she was so big, but she seemed so tiny to me. My guess was about 8pounds3oz. TJ guessed 8. When Kathleen put her on the scale she laughed,
“Oh my! Nine Fourteen!”
I said, “No way!” I made them show me the scale; I didn’t believe her! Then I got Hannah back and she nursed (even though the nursery Nazi said I needed to be careful and nurse her too much??) until TJ gave her a bath at 12:10am. It was so cool to watch that too and funny to listen to the nursery Nazi tell TJ about the perils of not vaccinating your hour-old infant. Hannah never left our room, and either TJ or I had her the entire time, except when Kathleen and Delilah had their brief turns before they left. I just was amazed at all the things I was experiencing with her that I’d missed with Jaron, and was SO thankful that I’d just VBAC’d a 10 pound baby! I was also really impressed that I got up, went to the rest room, walked around the room, took a shower, etc… I’d JUST had a baby! It was amazing, and an overwhelming feeling of thankfulness and peace surrounded us. I’m so blessed that the Lord delivered exactly what my heart desired, a healthy normal vaginal birth. He did exactly what I needed, exactly when I needed it, and He got me through.
When I started planning my VBAC, I think I expected it to “heal” me from my C-Section, but along the way, in great part due to Delilah being an amazing friend and support, I let go of that. I didn’t need one birth to heal another. Jaron’s birth was what it was, as would this one be whatever it was. The things that I missed out on with Jaron, and the pain that those things left, was real, but I came to a place where I could let myself be disappointed about it, but let it go. I came to realize that what bothered me about my cesarean wasn’t the surgery itself, or even the recovery. It was the fact that I missed out on the first 2 hours of my baby’s life. I didn’t even hold him until he was 2 hours old. Planning my VBAC became about not letting that happen again if it didn’t have to. And when I had those moments with Hannah, I knew that I’d been right in being sad to have missed out on those things with Jaron, and was so thankful to have those moments this time.
If anything, my VBAC helped me appreciate my C-Section more. I know that sounds crazy, but I feel like now I can fully appreciate that there is no EASY way to have a baby. Both experiences were hard, and had things that were disappointments (who wants a tear??). Both had recovery time. My C-Section was a hard experience to go through, and I‘m not discounting that. But by golly, my vaginal birth was hard work. They were hard in very different ways of course, but they were both beautiful too in that I was able to learn and grow from them, and, of course, they both resulted in a perfect and beautiful blessing. I can let them both be what they were, and move forward. I’d still pick vaginal birth over surgical birth any day though. On this side of both experiences, I feel stronger. Empowered. Faithful. And loved.
Next time I fully intend on planning another homebirth, and I hope that we get it. But I also know that I’ll go into that birth knowing that it will be what it will be, and God will give me what I need to get through it, just as He always has. I can’t wait to do it again!
Delilah,
I cannot even begin to know the words that could fully convey the tremendous amount of love and gratitude that I have for you.
You are an angel. I truly believe that God is working through you. I see Him in you; I feel His love in you. Your kindness, humility, courage, and spirit to serve others are inspiring. Your counsel and friendship is uplifting and encouraging. We are called to be the hands and feet of Christ, and you have answered the call enthusiastically. Thank you for having the heart for service that you do. Not only does it make you great at what you do, it makes you an inspiration to those around you.
What you did for me in the last year was so beyond the call of “doula services,” but you were willing to do it, and you did it with grace. During Hannah’s birth you were invaluable; a calm and steady presence, a knowing, encouraging, and skilled support. In the months leading to her birth, you were a counselor, a researcher, a teacher, and a friend. Thank you for always making me feel that you were emotionally invested in my family. I always felt like you wanted this as much as I did, and I believe that you did. I never once felt like you were there because you were payed to be. It felt natural for you to be there, like an old friend one desires to share the special moments with. You helped me see things I needed to see, understand things that I hadn’t before, and even helped me know what to pray, when the tears had run my words dry. Most of all, thank you for always praying. That meant more than anything else. I am so thankful that you were willing to walk this journey with me. It was an amazing journey, though a hard one, and it was a blessing to have such a beautiful friend join me.
On your hard days, I hope you will remember that you are helping people in more ways than you know. You are truly an amazing woman.
Thank you.
The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.
~ Proverbs 27:9
